I should have been a chiropractor
Posted January 28, 2009on:
Seriously. I’ve been thinking about this. And had I been better at math I think I would have been a chiropractor. Think about it:
- $40 a pop (and I don’t mean popping cracking backs; I mean per patient)
- A job that lets you inflict pain in order to help people (seriously, only the Mythbusters have better jobs – they get paid to blow shit up); I imagine this is a great stress relief (although probably not as much as an esthetician who gets paid to spread hot wax on bare skin and then rip out the hair)
- These guys have basically a double house; they live in one half and have their clinic in the other half (they’re kind of granola, but seem to know their stuff) – now that? Is a commute I could live with. Go over in your pajamas to open up. Geesh.
- Work three and a half days a week.
At least that has been my experience over the last two days. And although my back and hips do generally feel better on a deep level, I am fucking sore tonight.
(For those that want to know, here’s the easy to understand explanation: my left hip is lower than my right; my left shoulder is higher than my right; I have muscle tightness in my lower and middle back, bottom and top of my neck. My spine is kind of fucked.
The technical explanation: sublaxation (misalignment of vertebrae) in C1-2, C6, C7, T1-2, T3-6, L3-5, and Sacro-iliac joints.
And that, kids, is why when you hurt your back, GET IT FIXED RIGHT AWAY. Don’t wait 15 years or you’ll have to see your chiropractor 9 times in three weeks to start, in order to get a baby out of your uterus)
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